KINGSVILLE, TX - Nancy Jane McCay Phaup's soul was claimed by her Heavenly Father July 4, Independence Day, at 11:56 P.M. Nancy was accompanied at the time of death by her husband, Jim, and two adult children, Kathrine and Jonathan.
After a courageous but physically debilitating fight with cancer, Nancy's demeanor at the time of death was serene and accepting. Though she loved life, Nancy was completely accepting of being called home to Christ. Her only concern was that her family and friends would be prepared to let her go and would be alright without her continued physical presence.
Nancy was preceded in death by her mother, Ruth Marie Smith McCay and by her father Lt. Col. Leroy D. McCay (USAF). They spent their youth in Oklahoma (McAlester and El Reno areas) and retired in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Nancy was the apple of her grandparents' eyes and was perfection itself according to her paternal aunt, Florence "Sadie" McCay. Nancy cared, in her home, for both her mother and her maternal aunt, Lee "Tootsie" Morris, for several years before their deaths at advanced ages. She was a loving daughter and niece. An "army brat," Nancy was born June, 17, 1944 in Hattiesburg, Mississippi. In her early childhood, she and her mother accompanied her father to postings in Japan (during McArthur's post-WWII occupation), Guam, and Puerto Rico. Nancy had some memories of Japan and many fond memories of her family's stays in Guam and especially Puerto Rico. She had vivid memories of one trip that she and her mother made back to the USA on a banana boat. At one elementary school, Nancy was named "Miss Greenwich Village," which she always said marked the high point of her career as a beauty queen. Her many friends and admirers would disagree. Nancy graduated from Warner Robbins High School in Warner Robbins, Georgia, where her father was stationed at the local air base.
Nancy entered college in the fall of 1962 at Wesleyan College in Macon, Georgia. A favorite teacher was a young male teacher who was apt to call the girls "marvelous creatures." One wonders if he could have realized at the time just how prescient that label was for Nancy. In the spring of 1964, Nancy transferred to the University of New Mexico (UNM) in Albuquerque where she divided her week between living with her Aunt Tootsie on weekdays and spending weekends with her grandmother (Nin Nim) and Aunt Sadie. Aunt Sadie had an aging Pontiac that she called "Huldie," and Nancy named her own 1955 Chevy "Sylvester." It was at UNM, in January 1964, that Nancy first met Jim, who would soon become her steady boyfriend and eventual fiance and husband. Both were new transfer students (he from Kentucky) and had fortuitously signed up for the same government class - Comparative Politics taught by T. Phillip (Tom) Wolf - who became a lifelong friend. Jim, who sat on the front row, admired Nancy as she would squeeze past him each day to get to her seat. But Nancy made the first move, inviting Jim to a sorority party with a cave man theme. Chatting outside the building before class, she asked if he'd like to be her cave man (coincidentally his nickname in high school) and that was the beginning of a 44+ year courtship. Both graduated May 10, 1966 with bachelors degrees in political science. They were married the following day, May 11, in the small chapel on the UNM campus. The minister was Presbyterian; the service was partly Unitarian, partly nondenominational, and partly secular. College years friends included Connie Bower-Johnstone, Chuck Kennedy, Diane Zinn-Young, Sam McTeer, Lynn and Dick Scripter and Tom and Jori, Katie and Bob Boyd. Next, came the graduate school years with Jim at the University of Arizona (UA) in Tucson from 1966-1969. While Jim continued to study political science, Nancy became homemaker, lover, companion, typist, copy editor, and intellectual companion and equal. Good friends during graduate school were Anne and Bob Thomas, Pat and Layne Hoppe, Jan and Jim Craig, Diane and Craig Grau, Ina and Don Freeman, and others.
In the 1960s, few women attended graduate school. There were only three or four women among 50 or 60 graduate students in political science at UA at the time. The division of labor between Nancy and Jim was typical for the period. Jim thinks it was a crying shame that Nancy did not also attend graduate school or do so instead of him. As a teacher, Nancy was a natural. As a child, one of her favorite games was playing school, and she always had to be the teacher. A friend once stamped her feet and declared that "that damn Nancy McCay always has to be the teacher."
Jim played outside as a boy and tried to identify animal shapes among the clouds. Jim works hard to be a competent teacher; Nancy worked hard and became a superb teacher. Within a week, she always knew every student's name. She instinctively knew how to bring a work of literature alive. In recent years, Nancy would recognize each student's birthday in class by providing small cupcakes that her students at Presbyterian Pan American School referred to as "cakitos." They looked forward to those ten- minute birthday parties. While Nancy taught English grammar and literature, every class period was a geography class for her students. Nancy loved maps and took every occasion to show students, on a US or world map, where each place in a story or novel or in a current news story was located. Nancy picked this habit up from Col. Hal Justice, her high school government teacher, who traveled from Georgia to New Mexico to attend her wedding. They remained in contact by mail until Mr. Justus was well into his nineties and no longer up to continuing the correspondence. Nancy would learn the personal histories of her students and treat each of them as individuals. Over the years, Nancy received literally hundreds of cards, letters, and mementos from current and former students. On campus, students would always seek her out. They craved her recognition and friendship. Nancy and Jim spent two months during the summer of 1967 at the Survey Research Center at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor Michigan. It was a beautiful campus. This was the summer of the Detroit Riots and Nancy and Jim were driving around in the riot area just a week before the riots began. They were visiting Jim's Uncle Lloyd and Aunt Ruby Park who lived in Detroit. It was also a long hot summer on the Ann Arbor campus.
Nancy and Jim lived in a non-air conditioned one-room efficiency tenement -- known euphemistically on campus as married student housing. Nearby, Kenyan students cooked heavily-seasoned native dishes with lots of garlic, and the aroma filtered though the entire complex due to all the open windows. This was the first real test of the marriage. The only place to go to in case of an argument was to sit in the hallway or take a long walk. Nancy did a fair amount of hallway-sitting and Jim walked the campus a lot. But the marriage survived and came out stronger than before. The arguments which were quite intense at the time became a source of amusement with the lapse of time. Jim's first job after graduate school was at Florida Atlantic University in Boca Raton, Florida. Housing was so expensive that Nancy and Jim moved into an unfurnished apartment even though they had no furniture. Being practical folk, their first furniture was a nice stereo. Next was a cheap bed brought Okie-fashion (tied to the roof of the car) from Miami. The set was made complete with a metal patio table and some inexpensive lawn chairs. Jim did research on migrant farm workers in nearby Belle Glade and Pahokee - sites made famous by Edward R. Murrow in his classic documentary "Harvest of Shame." Nancy volunteered at a neighborhood center where she made some good friends, and helped introduce local children to the beach, which was about five miles away, for the first time. Judy and Tom Price were good friends.
In the Fall of 1970, Nancy and Jim moved to Kingsville, Texas so that Jim could teach at Texas AandI University. They lived at University Square Apartments across from the university for five years. Nancy wanted a house, but Jim was sure that he would soon get a job elsewhere and didn't want to be tied down to a house. In 1972, Nancy and Jim adopted their daughter Kathrine Pilar (Katie) and worked in the McGovern for President campaign. Katie attended all the rallies in a backpack. Her birth announcement proclaimed her candidacy for presidency one day. Nancy and Jim attended parties at the Mende home. Gunter Mende was the first person they met in Kingsville. Katie, Laura DeHoop, and Anne Huebel would sleep in the front bedroom in their identical plastic- covered cardboard boxes - an innovation in kiddie care that soon went the way of the Volkswagen Beetle. Good friends included the Carol and Terry Barragy, Jan and Tom Hughes, Pixie and Fred Matkin, Jeff Bishop, Edna and Mike Ybarra, and Randy Hughes. In 1975, Nancy and Jim moved to a home at 731 Santa Dolores Street where they lived until 1992. They shared a back fence with Russ and Kathy Huebel. In 1977, Nancy and Jim adopted again - Jonathan Miguel. Jon was a roly-poly little boy who sprouted into a near six-footer and acquired Nancy's love of cooking. Nancy was a full-time mom and enjoyed cooking, mothering, and reading. She also became active in the University Women's Club and several of its interest groups - gourmet, book club, and scholarship committee. Nancy helped found the book club and scholarship committee. During these years, close friends included the Gunter Mendes, Sally and Clark Magruder, Pat and Herman DeHoop, Kathy and Fred Hadley, Kathy and Russ Huebel, Kathy and Mark Anderson, Alida and Larry Larrichio, Jeanette and Sandy Hicks, Monika and Jack Hardy, Nan and Porky Myers, Sherry and Wendall Johnson, and many others. December 12,1991 was a big day, Nancy's daughter Katie had her first son, Paeton, and Nancy and Jim both were privileged to be present at his birth - which was a high point in both their lives. Within a year, Nancy and Jim moved to the house on Armstrong Street where they remained to the present. This was, in part, necessary to accommodate Aunt Tootsie moving in after the death of Nancy's Uncle John Morris. For a few years, Kate and Paeton lived in the guest house. Eventually, Nancy's mother also moved in with the family after the death of Nancy's father.
In January 1990, Nancy resumed her studies working toward a master's degree in English. During this time, Nancy served as an assistant instructor in the Department of Language and Literature at Texas AandI University. Nancy completed her master's degree May 1992. By that time, AandI had become Texas AandM University -Kingsville (TAMUK). Nancy's master's thesis was on the short stories of Bobbie Ann Mason, a Kentucky writer. From September 1992 to May 1995, Nancy served as a lecturer/visiting instructor in the Language and Literature Department. Later on, Nancy taught for six years at the privately-owned Intensive English Institute (IEI) located on the TAMUK campus. Nancy became a skilled ESL (English as a Second Language) teacher and eventually served as a core teacher, academic coordinator, and interim director.
Nancy loved the students (mostly adults from all over the world) that came to study English, and she formed many lasting friendships among both faculty and students. During these years, Nancy also did volunteer work with the local adult literacy organization in Kingsville. IEI was bought out by a larger company, and the Kingsville campus closed. At that time, Nancy moved to Presbyterian Pan American School (PPAS), a local secondary-level boarding school with mostly international students, primarily from Mexico. She taught at PPAS from August 2001 until cancer caused her to stop teaching on February 14, 2008. At PPAS, Nancy was named teacher of the year in 2004 and again in 2008, and served as a mentor teacher. She also sponsored the PPAS chapter of the secondary-level National Honor Society. Nancy belonged to two university-level academic honor societies - Sigma Tau Delta (English) and Pi Sigma Alpha (Political Science). During the Armstrong Avenue years, Nancy did jazzercise/aerobic exercise for several years, became a daily swimmer for about six months of the year, and continued to be active in the University Women's Club. She had recently jointed the Kingsville Music Club, and for the past few years had offered her house as a host home for young musicians during the young musicians competition sponsored by the Music Club and led by Jim and Mary Tryer.
Nancy's home became the center of an active social circle that included both native and international participants. Social gatherings were typically potlucks with everyone pitching in not only with food, but doing everything from planning and table-setting to cleaning up. Regulars at these functions, at various times, included: Marlis and Gunter Mende, Jaya and Nirmal Goswami (Nirmal frequently introduced himself as Nancy's twin brother - to the amusement of some guests and to the befuddlement of others) and Rohit, Stephen and Adline Sedory and Abigal and Sarah, Becky and Maurice Schmidt, Lisa and David Su, Caroline and Alan Eckert and Jacob, Sally Swofford, Janie and Paco Lopez, Olga and Mario Carranza, Galina and George Hopkins, Nancy Nagy and Dale Schruben, Brenda Melendy, Richard Hartwig, Alma Shanks, Tonie Canales, Clark Magruder (artist, sculptor, writer, friend), who is making a vessel in which to store Nancy's (and later Jim's) remains until they are eventually scattered by family members, Priya and Prasad Gavankar and Charuta, Jack and Ilene Yu, Paulina and Geogina Aquino and their family, Betty Eshom. Mary Ann Brookshire has been a fabulous next door neighbor. During the course of Nancy's illness many of these friendships blossomed and deepened as countless individuals have gone to great lengths to assist Nancy and the entire family. Particularly notable for their repeated visits and efforts, in addition to those already listed above, are Lillian and Bill Johnson, Kathy and Russ Huebel, Marge Peterson, Bobbie Stottlemyer, Sue and David Sabrio, and Margaret Carter. Others have substituted for Jim or Nancy at work including - Lillian Johnson for Nancy and Gary Lipscomb, Nirmal Goswami, Matt Price, Mary Mattingly, Mario Carranza, Ross Dudney, Richard Carrera, Al Ellis, and Jennifer Borrer - all for Jim. Thanks to Elizabeth Johnsey for singing patriotic songs to and with Nancy on the fourth of July - just hours before Nancy's death. A special thanks to Pastor Allan Eckert for offering catechism instruction to Nancy and Jim over several evenings and for officiating at Nancy's baptism and at her confirmation. Pastor Eckert also offered communion to Nancy at home on several occasions. Thanks to the entire congregation of St. Paul Lutheran Church in Kingsville for their loving acceptance of and support for Nancy and Jim. Jim's brother, Mark, and his niece, Heather Clark, came from Kentucky to say their goodbyes. Jim's cousin, Jo Ellen, and her husband, Bill, Ewin drove in from Indiana. Nancy was so happy to see them all. Thanks to our good friend Maurice Schmidt, who did a water color painting and several chalk drawings of Nancy and family members over the past few weeks. Thanks to Linda Erebia for the many years that she helped Nancy care for her mother and aunt. Thanks to Dr. Catherine Dulak of Corpus Christi who saw Nancy only once at her initial examination, but whose compassion and continuing support went far beyond anything that was required. The folks at Spohn Hospice were a wonderful help. Nancy received countless cards and emails, was placed on scores of prayer lists, and the family has been showered with flowers, food, and other items. So many people care for Nancy that the entire experience has been difficult to comprehend and humbling. How can the family ever begin to repay all the kindnesses that have been bestowed?
Survivors include Nancy's husband, Jim; her children -- Kathrine and Jonathan; and Kathrine's children - Paeton McCay Phaup; Thaddeus Richard Bents, Emma Jane-Anne Bents, and Seth Henry Bents. Also, Nancy's other "sons" Jeff Magruder and Michael Blaine Fordtran; Nancy's "twin brother," Nirmal Goswami; and her spiritual sisters Marlis Mende, Jaya Goswami, and Carol Jo Bean.
A memorial service was held on July 10th at St. Paul Lutheran Church, Kingsville, TX.
After a courageous but physically debilitating fight with cancer, Nancy's demeanor at the time of death was serene and accepting. Though she loved life, Nancy was completely accepting of being called home to Christ. Her only concern was that her family and friends would be prepared to let her go and would be alright without her continued physical presence.
Nancy was preceded in death by her mother, Ruth Marie Smith McCay and by her father Lt. Col. Leroy D. McCay (USAF). They spent their youth in Oklahoma (McAlester and El Reno areas) and retired in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Nancy was the apple of her grandparents' eyes and was perfection itself according to her paternal aunt, Florence "Sadie" McCay. Nancy cared, in her home, for both her mother and her maternal aunt, Lee "Tootsie" Morris, for several years before their deaths at advanced ages. She was a loving daughter and niece. An "army brat," Nancy was born June, 17, 1944 in Hattiesburg, Mississippi. In her early childhood, she and her mother accompanied her father to postings in Japan (during McArthur's post-WWII occupation), Guam, and Puerto Rico. Nancy had some memories of Japan and many fond memories of her family's stays in Guam and especially Puerto Rico. She had vivid memories of one trip that she and her mother made back to the USA on a banana boat. At one elementary school, Nancy was named "Miss Greenwich Village," which she always said marked the high point of her career as a beauty queen. Her many friends and admirers would disagree. Nancy graduated from Warner Robbins High School in Warner Robbins, Georgia, where her father was stationed at the local air base.
Nancy entered college in the fall of 1962 at Wesleyan College in Macon, Georgia. A favorite teacher was a young male teacher who was apt to call the girls "marvelous creatures." One wonders if he could have realized at the time just how prescient that label was for Nancy. In the spring of 1964, Nancy transferred to the University of New Mexico (UNM) in Albuquerque where she divided her week between living with her Aunt Tootsie on weekdays and spending weekends with her grandmother (Nin Nim) and Aunt Sadie. Aunt Sadie had an aging Pontiac that she called "Huldie," and Nancy named her own 1955 Chevy "Sylvester." It was at UNM, in January 1964, that Nancy first met Jim, who would soon become her steady boyfriend and eventual fiance and husband. Both were new transfer students (he from Kentucky) and had fortuitously signed up for the same government class - Comparative Politics taught by T. Phillip (Tom) Wolf - who became a lifelong friend. Jim, who sat on the front row, admired Nancy as she would squeeze past him each day to get to her seat. But Nancy made the first move, inviting Jim to a sorority party with a cave man theme. Chatting outside the building before class, she asked if he'd like to be her cave man (coincidentally his nickname in high school) and that was the beginning of a 44+ year courtship. Both graduated May 10, 1966 with bachelors degrees in political science. They were married the following day, May 11, in the small chapel on the UNM campus. The minister was Presbyterian; the service was partly Unitarian, partly nondenominational, and partly secular. College years friends included Connie Bower-Johnstone, Chuck Kennedy, Diane Zinn-Young, Sam McTeer, Lynn and Dick Scripter and Tom and Jori, Katie and Bob Boyd. Next, came the graduate school years with Jim at the University of Arizona (UA) in Tucson from 1966-1969. While Jim continued to study political science, Nancy became homemaker, lover, companion, typist, copy editor, and intellectual companion and equal. Good friends during graduate school were Anne and Bob Thomas, Pat and Layne Hoppe, Jan and Jim Craig, Diane and Craig Grau, Ina and Don Freeman, and others.
In the 1960s, few women attended graduate school. There were only three or four women among 50 or 60 graduate students in political science at UA at the time. The division of labor between Nancy and Jim was typical for the period. Jim thinks it was a crying shame that Nancy did not also attend graduate school or do so instead of him. As a teacher, Nancy was a natural. As a child, one of her favorite games was playing school, and she always had to be the teacher. A friend once stamped her feet and declared that "that damn Nancy McCay always has to be the teacher."
Jim played outside as a boy and tried to identify animal shapes among the clouds. Jim works hard to be a competent teacher; Nancy worked hard and became a superb teacher. Within a week, she always knew every student's name. She instinctively knew how to bring a work of literature alive. In recent years, Nancy would recognize each student's birthday in class by providing small cupcakes that her students at Presbyterian Pan American School referred to as "cakitos." They looked forward to those ten- minute birthday parties. While Nancy taught English grammar and literature, every class period was a geography class for her students. Nancy loved maps and took every occasion to show students, on a US or world map, where each place in a story or novel or in a current news story was located. Nancy picked this habit up from Col. Hal Justice, her high school government teacher, who traveled from Georgia to New Mexico to attend her wedding. They remained in contact by mail until Mr. Justus was well into his nineties and no longer up to continuing the correspondence. Nancy would learn the personal histories of her students and treat each of them as individuals. Over the years, Nancy received literally hundreds of cards, letters, and mementos from current and former students. On campus, students would always seek her out. They craved her recognition and friendship. Nancy and Jim spent two months during the summer of 1967 at the Survey Research Center at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor Michigan. It was a beautiful campus. This was the summer of the Detroit Riots and Nancy and Jim were driving around in the riot area just a week before the riots began. They were visiting Jim's Uncle Lloyd and Aunt Ruby Park who lived in Detroit. It was also a long hot summer on the Ann Arbor campus.
Nancy and Jim lived in a non-air conditioned one-room efficiency tenement -- known euphemistically on campus as married student housing. Nearby, Kenyan students cooked heavily-seasoned native dishes with lots of garlic, and the aroma filtered though the entire complex due to all the open windows. This was the first real test of the marriage. The only place to go to in case of an argument was to sit in the hallway or take a long walk. Nancy did a fair amount of hallway-sitting and Jim walked the campus a lot. But the marriage survived and came out stronger than before. The arguments which were quite intense at the time became a source of amusement with the lapse of time. Jim's first job after graduate school was at Florida Atlantic University in Boca Raton, Florida. Housing was so expensive that Nancy and Jim moved into an unfurnished apartment even though they had no furniture. Being practical folk, their first furniture was a nice stereo. Next was a cheap bed brought Okie-fashion (tied to the roof of the car) from Miami. The set was made complete with a metal patio table and some inexpensive lawn chairs. Jim did research on migrant farm workers in nearby Belle Glade and Pahokee - sites made famous by Edward R. Murrow in his classic documentary "Harvest of Shame." Nancy volunteered at a neighborhood center where she made some good friends, and helped introduce local children to the beach, which was about five miles away, for the first time. Judy and Tom Price were good friends.
In the Fall of 1970, Nancy and Jim moved to Kingsville, Texas so that Jim could teach at Texas AandI University. They lived at University Square Apartments across from the university for five years. Nancy wanted a house, but Jim was sure that he would soon get a job elsewhere and didn't want to be tied down to a house. In 1972, Nancy and Jim adopted their daughter Kathrine Pilar (Katie) and worked in the McGovern for President campaign. Katie attended all the rallies in a backpack. Her birth announcement proclaimed her candidacy for presidency one day. Nancy and Jim attended parties at the Mende home. Gunter Mende was the first person they met in Kingsville. Katie, Laura DeHoop, and Anne Huebel would sleep in the front bedroom in their identical plastic- covered cardboard boxes - an innovation in kiddie care that soon went the way of the Volkswagen Beetle. Good friends included the Carol and Terry Barragy, Jan and Tom Hughes, Pixie and Fred Matkin, Jeff Bishop, Edna and Mike Ybarra, and Randy Hughes. In 1975, Nancy and Jim moved to a home at 731 Santa Dolores Street where they lived until 1992. They shared a back fence with Russ and Kathy Huebel. In 1977, Nancy and Jim adopted again - Jonathan Miguel. Jon was a roly-poly little boy who sprouted into a near six-footer and acquired Nancy's love of cooking. Nancy was a full-time mom and enjoyed cooking, mothering, and reading. She also became active in the University Women's Club and several of its interest groups - gourmet, book club, and scholarship committee. Nancy helped found the book club and scholarship committee. During these years, close friends included the Gunter Mendes, Sally and Clark Magruder, Pat and Herman DeHoop, Kathy and Fred Hadley, Kathy and Russ Huebel, Kathy and Mark Anderson, Alida and Larry Larrichio, Jeanette and Sandy Hicks, Monika and Jack Hardy, Nan and Porky Myers, Sherry and Wendall Johnson, and many others. December 12,1991 was a big day, Nancy's daughter Katie had her first son, Paeton, and Nancy and Jim both were privileged to be present at his birth - which was a high point in both their lives. Within a year, Nancy and Jim moved to the house on Armstrong Street where they remained to the present. This was, in part, necessary to accommodate Aunt Tootsie moving in after the death of Nancy's Uncle John Morris. For a few years, Kate and Paeton lived in the guest house. Eventually, Nancy's mother also moved in with the family after the death of Nancy's father.
In January 1990, Nancy resumed her studies working toward a master's degree in English. During this time, Nancy served as an assistant instructor in the Department of Language and Literature at Texas AandI University. Nancy completed her master's degree May 1992. By that time, AandI had become Texas AandM University -Kingsville (TAMUK). Nancy's master's thesis was on the short stories of Bobbie Ann Mason, a Kentucky writer. From September 1992 to May 1995, Nancy served as a lecturer/visiting instructor in the Language and Literature Department. Later on, Nancy taught for six years at the privately-owned Intensive English Institute (IEI) located on the TAMUK campus. Nancy became a skilled ESL (English as a Second Language) teacher and eventually served as a core teacher, academic coordinator, and interim director.
Nancy loved the students (mostly adults from all over the world) that came to study English, and she formed many lasting friendships among both faculty and students. During these years, Nancy also did volunteer work with the local adult literacy organization in Kingsville. IEI was bought out by a larger company, and the Kingsville campus closed. At that time, Nancy moved to Presbyterian Pan American School (PPAS), a local secondary-level boarding school with mostly international students, primarily from Mexico. She taught at PPAS from August 2001 until cancer caused her to stop teaching on February 14, 2008. At PPAS, Nancy was named teacher of the year in 2004 and again in 2008, and served as a mentor teacher. She also sponsored the PPAS chapter of the secondary-level National Honor Society. Nancy belonged to two university-level academic honor societies - Sigma Tau Delta (English) and Pi Sigma Alpha (Political Science). During the Armstrong Avenue years, Nancy did jazzercise/aerobic exercise for several years, became a daily swimmer for about six months of the year, and continued to be active in the University Women's Club. She had recently jointed the Kingsville Music Club, and for the past few years had offered her house as a host home for young musicians during the young musicians competition sponsored by the Music Club and led by Jim and Mary Tryer.
Nancy's home became the center of an active social circle that included both native and international participants. Social gatherings were typically potlucks with everyone pitching in not only with food, but doing everything from planning and table-setting to cleaning up. Regulars at these functions, at various times, included: Marlis and Gunter Mende, Jaya and Nirmal Goswami (Nirmal frequently introduced himself as Nancy's twin brother - to the amusement of some guests and to the befuddlement of others) and Rohit, Stephen and Adline Sedory and Abigal and Sarah, Becky and Maurice Schmidt, Lisa and David Su, Caroline and Alan Eckert and Jacob, Sally Swofford, Janie and Paco Lopez, Olga and Mario Carranza, Galina and George Hopkins, Nancy Nagy and Dale Schruben, Brenda Melendy, Richard Hartwig, Alma Shanks, Tonie Canales, Clark Magruder (artist, sculptor, writer, friend), who is making a vessel in which to store Nancy's (and later Jim's) remains until they are eventually scattered by family members, Priya and Prasad Gavankar and Charuta, Jack and Ilene Yu, Paulina and Geogina Aquino and their family, Betty Eshom. Mary Ann Brookshire has been a fabulous next door neighbor. During the course of Nancy's illness many of these friendships blossomed and deepened as countless individuals have gone to great lengths to assist Nancy and the entire family. Particularly notable for their repeated visits and efforts, in addition to those already listed above, are Lillian and Bill Johnson, Kathy and Russ Huebel, Marge Peterson, Bobbie Stottlemyer, Sue and David Sabrio, and Margaret Carter. Others have substituted for Jim or Nancy at work including - Lillian Johnson for Nancy and Gary Lipscomb, Nirmal Goswami, Matt Price, Mary Mattingly, Mario Carranza, Ross Dudney, Richard Carrera, Al Ellis, and Jennifer Borrer - all for Jim. Thanks to Elizabeth Johnsey for singing patriotic songs to and with Nancy on the fourth of July - just hours before Nancy's death. A special thanks to Pastor Allan Eckert for offering catechism instruction to Nancy and Jim over several evenings and for officiating at Nancy's baptism and at her confirmation. Pastor Eckert also offered communion to Nancy at home on several occasions. Thanks to the entire congregation of St. Paul Lutheran Church in Kingsville for their loving acceptance of and support for Nancy and Jim. Jim's brother, Mark, and his niece, Heather Clark, came from Kentucky to say their goodbyes. Jim's cousin, Jo Ellen, and her husband, Bill, Ewin drove in from Indiana. Nancy was so happy to see them all. Thanks to our good friend Maurice Schmidt, who did a water color painting and several chalk drawings of Nancy and family members over the past few weeks. Thanks to Linda Erebia for the many years that she helped Nancy care for her mother and aunt. Thanks to Dr. Catherine Dulak of Corpus Christi who saw Nancy only once at her initial examination, but whose compassion and continuing support went far beyond anything that was required. The folks at Spohn Hospice were a wonderful help. Nancy received countless cards and emails, was placed on scores of prayer lists, and the family has been showered with flowers, food, and other items. So many people care for Nancy that the entire experience has been difficult to comprehend and humbling. How can the family ever begin to repay all the kindnesses that have been bestowed?
Survivors include Nancy's husband, Jim; her children -- Kathrine and Jonathan; and Kathrine's children - Paeton McCay Phaup; Thaddeus Richard Bents, Emma Jane-Anne Bents, and Seth Henry Bents. Also, Nancy's other "sons" Jeff Magruder and Michael Blaine Fordtran; Nancy's "twin brother," Nirmal Goswami; and her spiritual sisters Marlis Mende, Jaya Goswami, and Carol Jo Bean.
A memorial service was held on July 10th at St. Paul Lutheran Church, Kingsville, TX.
KINGSVILLE, TX - Nancy Jane McCay Phaup's soul was claimed by her Heavenly Father July 4, Independence Day, at 11:56 P.M. Nancy was accompanied at the time of death by her husband, Jim, and two adult children, Kathrine and Jonathan.
After a courageous but physically debilitating fight with cancer, Nancy's demeanor at the time of death was serene and accepting. Though she loved life, Nancy was completely accepting of being called home to Christ. Her only concern was that her family and friends would be prepared to let her go and would be alright without her continued physical presence.
Nancy was preceded in death by her mother, Ruth Marie Smith McCay and by her father Lt. Col. Leroy D. McCay (USAF). They spent their youth in Oklahoma (McAlester and El Reno areas) and retired in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Nancy was the apple of her grandparents' eyes and was perfection itself according to her paternal aunt, Florence "Sadie" McCay. Nancy cared, in her home, for both her mother and her maternal aunt, Lee "Tootsie" Morris, for several years before their deaths at advanced ages. She was a loving daughter and niece. An "army brat," Nancy was born June, 17, 1944 in Hattiesburg, Mississippi. In her early childhood, she and her mother accompanied her father to postings in Japan (during McArthur's post-WWII occupation), Guam, and Puerto Rico. Nancy had some memories of Japan and many fond memories of her family's stays in Guam and especially Puerto Rico. She had vivid memories of one trip that she and her mother made back to the USA on a banana boat. At one elementary school, Nancy was named "Miss Greenwich Village," which she always said marked the high point of her career as a beauty queen. Her many friends and admirers would disagree. Nancy graduated from Warner Robbins High School in Warner Robbins, Georgia, where her father was stationed at the local air base.
Nancy entered college in the fall of 1962 at Wesleyan College in Macon, Georgia. A favorite teacher was a young male teacher who was apt to call the girls "marvelous creatures." One wonders if he could have realized at the time just how prescient that label was for Nancy. In the spring of 1964, Nancy transferred to the University of New Mexico (UNM) in Albuquerque where she divided her week between living with her Aunt Tootsie on weekdays and spending weekends with her grandmother (Nin Nim) and Aunt Sadie. Aunt Sadie had an aging Pontiac that she called "Huldie," and Nancy named her own 1955 Chevy "Sylvester." It was at UNM, in January 1964, that Nancy first met Jim, who would soon become her steady boyfriend and eventual fiance and husband. Both were new transfer students (he from Kentucky) and had fortuitously signed up for the same government class - Comparative Politics taught by T. Phillip (Tom) Wolf - who became a lifelong friend. Jim, who sat on the front row, admired Nancy as she would squeeze past him each day to get to her seat. But Nancy made the first move, inviting Jim to a sorority party with a cave man theme. Chatting outside the building before class, she asked if he'd like to be her cave man (coincidentally his nickname in high school) and that was the beginning of a 44+ year courtship. Both graduated May 10, 1966 with bachelors degrees in political science. They were married the following day, May 11, in the small chapel on the UNM campus. The minister was Presbyterian; the service was partly Unitarian, partly nondenominational, and partly secular. College years friends included Connie Bower-Johnstone, Chuck Kennedy, Diane Zinn-Young, Sam McTeer, Lynn and Dick Scripter and Tom and Jori, Katie and Bob Boyd. Next, came the graduate school years with Jim at the University of Arizona (UA) in Tucson from 1966-1969. While Jim continued to study political science, Nancy became homemaker, lover, companion, typist, copy editor, and intellectual companion and equal. Good friends during graduate school were Anne and Bob Thomas, Pat and Layne Hoppe, Jan and Jim Craig, Diane and Craig Grau, Ina and Don Freeman, and others.
In the 1960s, few women attended graduate school. There were only three or four women among 50 or 60 graduate students in political science at UA at the time. The division of labor between Nancy and Jim was typical for the period. Jim thinks it was a crying shame that Nancy did not also attend graduate school or do so instead of him. As a teacher, Nancy was a natural. As a child, one of her favorite games was playing school, and she always had to be the teacher. A friend once stamped her feet and declared that "that damn Nancy McCay always has to be the teacher."
Jim played outside as a boy and tried to identify animal shapes among the clouds. Jim works hard to be a competent teacher; Nancy worked hard and became a superb teacher. Within a week, she always knew every student's name. She instinctively knew how to bring a work of literature alive. In recent years, Nancy would recognize each student's birthday in class by providing small cupcakes that her students at Presbyterian Pan American School referred to as "cakitos." They looked forward to those ten- minute birthday parties. While Nancy taught English grammar and literature, every class period was a geography class for her students. Nancy loved maps and took every occasion to show students, on a US or world map, where each place in a story or novel or in a current news story was located. Nancy picked this habit up from Col. Hal Justice, her high school government teacher, who traveled from Georgia to New Mexico to attend her wedding. They remained in contact by mail until Mr. Justus was well into his nineties and no longer up to continuing the correspondence. Nancy would learn the personal histories of her students and treat each of them as individuals. Over the years, Nancy received literally hundreds of cards, letters, and mementos from current and former students. On campus, students would always seek her out. They craved her recognition and friendship. Nancy and Jim spent two months during the summer of 1967 at the Survey Research Center at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor Michigan. It was a beautiful campus. This was the summer of the Detroit Riots and Nancy and Jim were driving around in the riot area just a week before the riots began. They were visiting Jim's Uncle Lloyd and Aunt Ruby Park who lived in Detroit. It was also a long hot summer on the Ann Arbor campus.
Nancy and Jim lived in a non-air conditioned one-room efficiency tenement -- known euphemistically on campus as married student housing. Nearby, Kenyan students cooked heavily-seasoned native dishes with lots of garlic, and the aroma filtered though the entire complex due to all the open windows. This was the first real test of the marriage. The only place to go to in case of an argument was to sit in the hallway or take a long walk. Nancy did a fair amount of hallway-sitting and Jim walked the campus a lot. But the marriage survived and came out stronger than before. The arguments which were quite intense at the time became a source of amusement with the lapse of time. Jim's first job after graduate school was at Florida Atlantic University in Boca Raton, Florida. Housing was so expensive that Nancy and Jim moved into an unfurnished apartment even though they had no furniture. Being practical folk, their first furniture was a nice stereo. Next was a cheap bed brought Okie-fashion (tied to the roof of the car) from Miami. The set was made complete with a metal patio table and some inexpensive lawn chairs. Jim did research on migrant farm workers in nearby Belle Glade and Pahokee - sites made famous by Edward R. Murrow in his classic documentary "Harvest of Shame." Nancy volunteered at a neighborhood center where she made some good friends, and helped introduce local children to the beach, which was about five miles away, for the first time. Judy and Tom Price were good friends.
In the Fall of 1970, Nancy and Jim moved to Kingsville, Texas so that Jim could teach at Texas AandI University. They lived at University Square Apartments across from the university for five years. Nancy wanted a house, but Jim was sure that he would soon get a job elsewhere and didn't want to be tied down to a house. In 1972, Nancy and Jim adopted their daughter Kathrine Pilar (Katie) and worked in the McGovern for President campaign. Katie attended all the rallies in a backpack. Her birth announcement proclaimed her candidacy for presidency one day. Nancy and Jim attended parties at the Mende home. Gunter Mende was the first person they met in Kingsville. Katie, Laura DeHoop, and Anne Huebel would sleep in the front bedroom in their identical plastic- covered cardboard boxes - an innovation in kiddie care that soon went the way of the Volkswagen Beetle. Good friends included the Carol and Terry Barragy, Jan and Tom Hughes, Pixie and Fred Matkin, Jeff Bishop, Edna and Mike Ybarra, and Randy Hughes. In 1975, Nancy and Jim moved to a home at 731 Santa Dolores Street where they lived until 1992. They shared a back fence with Russ and Kathy Huebel. In 1977, Nancy and Jim adopted again - Jonathan Miguel. Jon was a roly-poly little boy who sprouted into a near six-footer and acquired Nancy's love of cooking. Nancy was a full-time mom and enjoyed cooking, mothering, and reading. She also became active in the University Women's Club and several of its interest groups - gourmet, book club, and scholarship committee. Nancy helped found the book club and scholarship committee. During these years, close friends included the Gunter Mendes, Sally and Clark Magruder, Pat and Herman DeHoop, Kathy and Fred Hadley, Kathy and Russ Huebel, Kathy and Mark Anderson, Alida and Larry Larrichio, Jeanette and Sandy Hicks, Monika and Jack Hardy, Nan and Porky Myers, Sherry and Wendall Johnson, and many others. December 12,1991 was a big day, Nancy's daughter Katie had her first son, Paeton, and Nancy and Jim both were privileged to be present at his birth - which was a high point in both their lives. Within a year, Nancy and Jim moved to the house on Armstrong Street where they remained to the present. This was, in part, necessary to accommodate Aunt Tootsie moving in after the death of Nancy's Uncle John Morris. For a few years, Kate and Paeton lived in the guest house. Eventually, Nancy's mother also moved in with the family after the death of Nancy's father.
In January 1990, Nancy resumed her studies working toward a master's degree in English. During this time, Nancy served as an assistant instructor in the Department of Language and Literature at Texas AandI University. Nancy completed her master's degree May 1992. By that time, AandI had become Texas AandM University -Kingsville (TAMUK). Nancy's master's thesis was on the short stories of Bobbie Ann Mason, a Kentucky writer. From September 1992 to May 1995, Nancy served as a lecturer/visiting instructor in the Language and Literature Department. Later on, Nancy taught for six years at the privately-owned Intensive English Institute (IEI) located on the TAMUK campus. Nancy became a skilled ESL (English as a Second Language) teacher and eventually served as a core teacher, academic coordinator, and interim director.
Nancy loved the students (mostly adults from all over the world) that came to study English, and she formed many lasting friendships among both faculty and students. During these years, Nancy also did volunteer work with the local adult literacy organization in Kingsville. IEI was bought out by a larger company, and the Kingsville campus closed. At that time, Nancy moved to Presbyterian Pan American School (PPAS), a local secondary-level boarding school with mostly international students, primarily from Mexico. She taught at PPAS from August 2001 until cancer caused her to stop teaching on February 14, 2008. At PPAS, Nancy was named teacher of the year in 2004 and again in 2008, and served as a mentor teacher. She also sponsored the PPAS chapter of the secondary-level National Honor Society. Nancy belonged to two university-level academic honor societies - Sigma Tau Delta (English) and Pi Sigma Alpha (Political Science). During the Armstrong Avenue years, Nancy did jazzercise/aerobic exercise for several years, became a daily swimmer for about six months of the year, and continued to be active in the University Women's Club. She had recently jointed the Kingsville Music Club, and for the past few years had offered her house as a host home for young musicians during the young musicians competition sponsored by the Music Club and led by Jim and Mary Tryer.
Nancy's home became the center of an active social circle that included both native and international participants. Social gatherings were typically potlucks with everyone pitching in not only with food, but doing everything from planning and table-setting to cleaning up. Regulars at these functions, at various times, included: Marlis and Gunter Mende, Jaya and Nirmal Goswami (Nirmal frequently introduced himself as Nancy's twin brother - to the amusement of some guests and to the befuddlement of others) and Rohit, Stephen and Adline Sedory and Abigal and Sarah, Becky and Maurice Schmidt, Lisa and David Su, Caroline and Alan Eckert and Jacob, Sally Swofford, Janie and Paco Lopez, Olga and Mario Carranza, Galina and George Hopkins, Nancy Nagy and Dale Schruben, Brenda Melendy, Richard Hartwig, Alma Shanks, Tonie Canales, Clark Magruder (artist, sculptor, writer, friend), who is making a vessel in which to store Nancy's (and later Jim's) remains until they are eventually scattered by family members, Priya and Prasad Gavankar and Charuta, Jack and Ilene Yu, Paulina and Geogina Aquino and their family, Betty Eshom. Mary Ann Brookshire has been a fabulous next door neighbor. During the course of Nancy's illness many of these friendships blossomed and deepened as countless individuals have gone to great lengths to assist Nancy and the entire family. Particularly notable for their repeated visits and efforts, in addition to those already listed above, are Lillian and Bill Johnson, Kathy and Russ Huebel, Marge Peterson, Bobbie Stottlemyer, Sue and David Sabrio, and Margaret Carter. Others have substituted for Jim or Nancy at work including - Lillian Johnson for Nancy and Gary Lipscomb, Nirmal Goswami, Matt Price, Mary Mattingly, Mario Carranza, Ross Dudney, Richard Carrera, Al Ellis, and Jennifer Borrer - all for Jim. Thanks to Elizabeth Johnsey for singing patriotic songs to and with Nancy on the fourth of July - just hours before Nancy's death. A special thanks to Pastor Allan Eckert for offering catechism instruction to Nancy and Jim over several evenings and for officiating at Nancy's baptism and at her confirmation. Pastor Eckert also offered communion to Nancy at home on several occasions. Thanks to the entire congregation of St. Paul Lutheran Church in Kingsville for their loving acceptance of and support for Nancy and Jim. Jim's brother, Mark, and his niece, Heather Clark, came from Kentucky to say their goodbyes. Jim's cousin, Jo Ellen, and her husband, Bill, Ewin drove in from Indiana. Nancy was so happy to see them all. Thanks to our good friend Maurice Schmidt, who did a water color painting and several chalk drawings of Nancy and family members over the past few weeks. Thanks to Linda Erebia for the many years that she helped Nancy care for her mother and aunt. Thanks to Dr. Catherine Dulak of Corpus Christi who saw Nancy only once at her initial examination, but whose compassion and continuing support went far beyond anything that was required. The folks at Spohn Hospice were a wonderful help. Nancy received countless cards and emails, was placed on scores of prayer lists, and the family has been showered with flowers, food, and other items. So many people care for Nancy that the entire experience has been difficult to comprehend and humbling. How can the family ever begin to repay all the kindnesses that have been bestowed?
Survivors include Nancy's husband, Jim; her children -- Kathrine and Jonathan; and Kathrine's children - Paeton McCay Phaup; Thaddeus Richard Bents, Emma Jane-Anne Bents, and Seth Henry Bents. Also, Nancy's other "sons" Jeff Magruder and Michael Blaine Fordtran; Nancy's "twin brother," Nirmal Goswami; and her spiritual sisters Marlis Mende, Jaya Goswami, and Carol Jo Bean.
A memorial service was held on July 10th at St. Paul Lutheran Church, Kingsville, TX.
After a courageous but physically debilitating fight with cancer, Nancy's demeanor at the time of death was serene and accepting. Though she loved life, Nancy was completely accepting of being called home to Christ. Her only concern was that her family and friends would be prepared to let her go and would be alright without her continued physical presence.
Nancy was preceded in death by her mother, Ruth Marie Smith McCay and by her father Lt. Col. Leroy D. McCay (USAF). They spent their youth in Oklahoma (McAlester and El Reno areas) and retired in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Nancy was the apple of her grandparents' eyes and was perfection itself according to her paternal aunt, Florence "Sadie" McCay. Nancy cared, in her home, for both her mother and her maternal aunt, Lee "Tootsie" Morris, for several years before their deaths at advanced ages. She was a loving daughter and niece. An "army brat," Nancy was born June, 17, 1944 in Hattiesburg, Mississippi. In her early childhood, she and her mother accompanied her father to postings in Japan (during McArthur's post-WWII occupation), Guam, and Puerto Rico. Nancy had some memories of Japan and many fond memories of her family's stays in Guam and especially Puerto Rico. She had vivid memories of one trip that she and her mother made back to the USA on a banana boat. At one elementary school, Nancy was named "Miss Greenwich Village," which she always said marked the high point of her career as a beauty queen. Her many friends and admirers would disagree. Nancy graduated from Warner Robbins High School in Warner Robbins, Georgia, where her father was stationed at the local air base.
Nancy entered college in the fall of 1962 at Wesleyan College in Macon, Georgia. A favorite teacher was a young male teacher who was apt to call the girls "marvelous creatures." One wonders if he could have realized at the time just how prescient that label was for Nancy. In the spring of 1964, Nancy transferred to the University of New Mexico (UNM) in Albuquerque where she divided her week between living with her Aunt Tootsie on weekdays and spending weekends with her grandmother (Nin Nim) and Aunt Sadie. Aunt Sadie had an aging Pontiac that she called "Huldie," and Nancy named her own 1955 Chevy "Sylvester." It was at UNM, in January 1964, that Nancy first met Jim, who would soon become her steady boyfriend and eventual fiance and husband. Both were new transfer students (he from Kentucky) and had fortuitously signed up for the same government class - Comparative Politics taught by T. Phillip (Tom) Wolf - who became a lifelong friend. Jim, who sat on the front row, admired Nancy as she would squeeze past him each day to get to her seat. But Nancy made the first move, inviting Jim to a sorority party with a cave man theme. Chatting outside the building before class, she asked if he'd like to be her cave man (coincidentally his nickname in high school) and that was the beginning of a 44+ year courtship. Both graduated May 10, 1966 with bachelors degrees in political science. They were married the following day, May 11, in the small chapel on the UNM campus. The minister was Presbyterian; the service was partly Unitarian, partly nondenominational, and partly secular. College years friends included Connie Bower-Johnstone, Chuck Kennedy, Diane Zinn-Young, Sam McTeer, Lynn and Dick Scripter and Tom and Jori, Katie and Bob Boyd. Next, came the graduate school years with Jim at the University of Arizona (UA) in Tucson from 1966-1969. While Jim continued to study political science, Nancy became homemaker, lover, companion, typist, copy editor, and intellectual companion and equal. Good friends during graduate school were Anne and Bob Thomas, Pat and Layne Hoppe, Jan and Jim Craig, Diane and Craig Grau, Ina and Don Freeman, and others.
In the 1960s, few women attended graduate school. There were only three or four women among 50 or 60 graduate students in political science at UA at the time. The division of labor between Nancy and Jim was typical for the period. Jim thinks it was a crying shame that Nancy did not also attend graduate school or do so instead of him. As a teacher, Nancy was a natural. As a child, one of her favorite games was playing school, and she always had to be the teacher. A friend once stamped her feet and declared that "that damn Nancy McCay always has to be the teacher."
Jim played outside as a boy and tried to identify animal shapes among the clouds. Jim works hard to be a competent teacher; Nancy worked hard and became a superb teacher. Within a week, she always knew every student's name. She instinctively knew how to bring a work of literature alive. In recent years, Nancy would recognize each student's birthday in class by providing small cupcakes that her students at Presbyterian Pan American School referred to as "cakitos." They looked forward to those ten- minute birthday parties. While Nancy taught English grammar and literature, every class period was a geography class for her students. Nancy loved maps and took every occasion to show students, on a US or world map, where each place in a story or novel or in a current news story was located. Nancy picked this habit up from Col. Hal Justice, her high school government teacher, who traveled from Georgia to New Mexico to attend her wedding. They remained in contact by mail until Mr. Justus was well into his nineties and no longer up to continuing the correspondence. Nancy would learn the personal histories of her students and treat each of them as individuals. Over the years, Nancy received literally hundreds of cards, letters, and mementos from current and former students. On campus, students would always seek her out. They craved her recognition and friendship. Nancy and Jim spent two months during the summer of 1967 at the Survey Research Center at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor Michigan. It was a beautiful campus. This was the summer of the Detroit Riots and Nancy and Jim were driving around in the riot area just a week before the riots began. They were visiting Jim's Uncle Lloyd and Aunt Ruby Park who lived in Detroit. It was also a long hot summer on the Ann Arbor campus.
Nancy and Jim lived in a non-air conditioned one-room efficiency tenement -- known euphemistically on campus as married student housing. Nearby, Kenyan students cooked heavily-seasoned native dishes with lots of garlic, and the aroma filtered though the entire complex due to all the open windows. This was the first real test of the marriage. The only place to go to in case of an argument was to sit in the hallway or take a long walk. Nancy did a fair amount of hallway-sitting and Jim walked the campus a lot. But the marriage survived and came out stronger than before. The arguments which were quite intense at the time became a source of amusement with the lapse of time. Jim's first job after graduate school was at Florida Atlantic University in Boca Raton, Florida. Housing was so expensive that Nancy and Jim moved into an unfurnished apartment even though they had no furniture. Being practical folk, their first furniture was a nice stereo. Next was a cheap bed brought Okie-fashion (tied to the roof of the car) from Miami. The set was made complete with a metal patio table and some inexpensive lawn chairs. Jim did research on migrant farm workers in nearby Belle Glade and Pahokee - sites made famous by Edward R. Murrow in his classic documentary "Harvest of Shame." Nancy volunteered at a neighborhood center where she made some good friends, and helped introduce local children to the beach, which was about five miles away, for the first time. Judy and Tom Price were good friends.
In the Fall of 1970, Nancy and Jim moved to Kingsville, Texas so that Jim could teach at Texas AandI University. They lived at University Square Apartments across from the university for five years. Nancy wanted a house, but Jim was sure that he would soon get a job elsewhere and didn't want to be tied down to a house. In 1972, Nancy and Jim adopted their daughter Kathrine Pilar (Katie) and worked in the McGovern for President campaign. Katie attended all the rallies in a backpack. Her birth announcement proclaimed her candidacy for presidency one day. Nancy and Jim attended parties at the Mende home. Gunter Mende was the first person they met in Kingsville. Katie, Laura DeHoop, and Anne Huebel would sleep in the front bedroom in their identical plastic- covered cardboard boxes - an innovation in kiddie care that soon went the way of the Volkswagen Beetle. Good friends included the Carol and Terry Barragy, Jan and Tom Hughes, Pixie and Fred Matkin, Jeff Bishop, Edna and Mike Ybarra, and Randy Hughes. In 1975, Nancy and Jim moved to a home at 731 Santa Dolores Street where they lived until 1992. They shared a back fence with Russ and Kathy Huebel. In 1977, Nancy and Jim adopted again - Jonathan Miguel. Jon was a roly-poly little boy who sprouted into a near six-footer and acquired Nancy's love of cooking. Nancy was a full-time mom and enjoyed cooking, mothering, and reading. She also became active in the University Women's Club and several of its interest groups - gourmet, book club, and scholarship committee. Nancy helped found the book club and scholarship committee. During these years, close friends included the Gunter Mendes, Sally and Clark Magruder, Pat and Herman DeHoop, Kathy and Fred Hadley, Kathy and Russ Huebel, Kathy and Mark Anderson, Alida and Larry Larrichio, Jeanette and Sandy Hicks, Monika and Jack Hardy, Nan and Porky Myers, Sherry and Wendall Johnson, and many others. December 12,1991 was a big day, Nancy's daughter Katie had her first son, Paeton, and Nancy and Jim both were privileged to be present at his birth - which was a high point in both their lives. Within a year, Nancy and Jim moved to the house on Armstrong Street where they remained to the present. This was, in part, necessary to accommodate Aunt Tootsie moving in after the death of Nancy's Uncle John Morris. For a few years, Kate and Paeton lived in the guest house. Eventually, Nancy's mother also moved in with the family after the death of Nancy's father.
In January 1990, Nancy resumed her studies working toward a master's degree in English. During this time, Nancy served as an assistant instructor in the Department of Language and Literature at Texas AandI University. Nancy completed her master's degree May 1992. By that time, AandI had become Texas AandM University -Kingsville (TAMUK). Nancy's master's thesis was on the short stories of Bobbie Ann Mason, a Kentucky writer. From September 1992 to May 1995, Nancy served as a lecturer/visiting instructor in the Language and Literature Department. Later on, Nancy taught for six years at the privately-owned Intensive English Institute (IEI) located on the TAMUK campus. Nancy became a skilled ESL (English as a Second Language) teacher and eventually served as a core teacher, academic coordinator, and interim director.
Nancy loved the students (mostly adults from all over the world) that came to study English, and she formed many lasting friendships among both faculty and students. During these years, Nancy also did volunteer work with the local adult literacy organization in Kingsville. IEI was bought out by a larger company, and the Kingsville campus closed. At that time, Nancy moved to Presbyterian Pan American School (PPAS), a local secondary-level boarding school with mostly international students, primarily from Mexico. She taught at PPAS from August 2001 until cancer caused her to stop teaching on February 14, 2008. At PPAS, Nancy was named teacher of the year in 2004 and again in 2008, and served as a mentor teacher. She also sponsored the PPAS chapter of the secondary-level National Honor Society. Nancy belonged to two university-level academic honor societies - Sigma Tau Delta (English) and Pi Sigma Alpha (Political Science). During the Armstrong Avenue years, Nancy did jazzercise/aerobic exercise for several years, became a daily swimmer for about six months of the year, and continued to be active in the University Women's Club. She had recently jointed the Kingsville Music Club, and for the past few years had offered her house as a host home for young musicians during the young musicians competition sponsored by the Music Club and led by Jim and Mary Tryer.
Nancy's home became the center of an active social circle that included both native and international participants. Social gatherings were typically potlucks with everyone pitching in not only with food, but doing everything from planning and table-setting to cleaning up. Regulars at these functions, at various times, included: Marlis and Gunter Mende, Jaya and Nirmal Goswami (Nirmal frequently introduced himself as Nancy's twin brother - to the amusement of some guests and to the befuddlement of others) and Rohit, Stephen and Adline Sedory and Abigal and Sarah, Becky and Maurice Schmidt, Lisa and David Su, Caroline and Alan Eckert and Jacob, Sally Swofford, Janie and Paco Lopez, Olga and Mario Carranza, Galina and George Hopkins, Nancy Nagy and Dale Schruben, Brenda Melendy, Richard Hartwig, Alma Shanks, Tonie Canales, Clark Magruder (artist, sculptor, writer, friend), who is making a vessel in which to store Nancy's (and later Jim's) remains until they are eventually scattered by family members, Priya and Prasad Gavankar and Charuta, Jack and Ilene Yu, Paulina and Geogina Aquino and their family, Betty Eshom. Mary Ann Brookshire has been a fabulous next door neighbor. During the course of Nancy's illness many of these friendships blossomed and deepened as countless individuals have gone to great lengths to assist Nancy and the entire family. Particularly notable for their repeated visits and efforts, in addition to those already listed above, are Lillian and Bill Johnson, Kathy and Russ Huebel, Marge Peterson, Bobbie Stottlemyer, Sue and David Sabrio, and Margaret Carter. Others have substituted for Jim or Nancy at work including - Lillian Johnson for Nancy and Gary Lipscomb, Nirmal Goswami, Matt Price, Mary Mattingly, Mario Carranza, Ross Dudney, Richard Carrera, Al Ellis, and Jennifer Borrer - all for Jim. Thanks to Elizabeth Johnsey for singing patriotic songs to and with Nancy on the fourth of July - just hours before Nancy's death. A special thanks to Pastor Allan Eckert for offering catechism instruction to Nancy and Jim over several evenings and for officiating at Nancy's baptism and at her confirmation. Pastor Eckert also offered communion to Nancy at home on several occasions. Thanks to the entire congregation of St. Paul Lutheran Church in Kingsville for their loving acceptance of and support for Nancy and Jim. Jim's brother, Mark, and his niece, Heather Clark, came from Kentucky to say their goodbyes. Jim's cousin, Jo Ellen, and her husband, Bill, Ewin drove in from Indiana. Nancy was so happy to see them all. Thanks to our good friend Maurice Schmidt, who did a water color painting and several chalk drawings of Nancy and family members over the past few weeks. Thanks to Linda Erebia for the many years that she helped Nancy care for her mother and aunt. Thanks to Dr. Catherine Dulak of Corpus Christi who saw Nancy only once at her initial examination, but whose compassion and continuing support went far beyond anything that was required. The folks at Spohn Hospice were a wonderful help. Nancy received countless cards and emails, was placed on scores of prayer lists, and the family has been showered with flowers, food, and other items. So many people care for Nancy that the entire experience has been difficult to comprehend and humbling. How can the family ever begin to repay all the kindnesses that have been bestowed?
Survivors include Nancy's husband, Jim; her children -- Kathrine and Jonathan; and Kathrine's children - Paeton McCay Phaup; Thaddeus Richard Bents, Emma Jane-Anne Bents, and Seth Henry Bents. Also, Nancy's other "sons" Jeff Magruder and Michael Blaine Fordtran; Nancy's "twin brother," Nirmal Goswami; and her spiritual sisters Marlis Mende, Jaya Goswami, and Carol Jo Bean.
A memorial service was held on July 10th at St. Paul Lutheran Church, Kingsville, TX.
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